Monday, November 29, 2010

love=knife

how can I be happy when i have so much pain?
so much anguish?
so much bitterness?
and its all tied to one person,

simple fact is i bleed inside,
and the open wound has been flowing like a gushing torrent for months now,
every move made gets me lodged deeper.
every step i take leaves me gasping for air,

no one knows how i sit by myself at night and cry,
no one sees the sadness in my eyes,
and its my fault,
i just don't think that i can let anyone in anymore,

love is like a serrated knife plunged in my back,
just when i feel like its not there anymore,
its twisted and i am left in agony yet again,
and i cannot bear much more of the pain in brings....

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

hate myself

"i hate myself for loving you..."
words made popular by Joan Jett,
and words i know all too well...

Saturday, November 20, 2010

i lie...

i recently stumbled upon some information that truly sent a knife plunging rite through my heart,
the girl of my dreams has started seeing someone,
and although i knew this day would come,
i never anticipated it to hurt so much,

i guess once the person you love tells you that your simply not good enough for her then all bets are off,
if there is one thing i regret it would be telling her how i really felt,
i should have just remained silent about it and be left alone,
it was so easy to fall for her though,

my head is a mess of thoughts right now,
i sit alone most of the time and ponder,
but ultimately i think the best decision is to leave her world completely,
runaway to avoid the pain and tell myself

im okay,
dont worry, im okay,

yes im seriously okay,
maybe one day these lies will seem true...

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Orgy - Stitches



If it stayed i'd never leave it
If that turned around
I'd grieve the special dirty things that we used to talk about
I mean that loving you is strange
And adored by me throughout oh no it's you again
Someday soon you'll find that someone
Waiting for the chance to beat you
Drooling on the set to feel you
Blessing you with every kiss

Tying yourself to me
Stitch up my emptiness cause your the death of me
So precious loving the thrill
Tying yourself to me
Stitch up my emptiness cause your the death of me
So precious loving the thrill

Such the patient one who needs me
The spoiled one who wins
So shocking where's your sense
Don't you know i hate you, ohoh
Unsatisfied,you little girl.

Tying yourself to me
Stitch up my emptiness cause your the death of me
So precious loving the thrill
Tying yourself to me
Stitch up my emptiness cause your the death of me
So precious loving the thrill

Rolling dice and seeming queer
Bastard love,a sick affair
Let's see what new disease you'll fetch
I mean that fucking you is strange
And adored by me throughout
Oh no it's you again
Blessing you with every kiss

So precious you know this hate of mine exploded
I'm so deranged you know
I will never be the same

Tying yourself to me
Stitch up my emptiness cause your the death of me
So precious loving the thrill
Tying yourself to me
Stitch up my emptiness cause your the death of me
So precious loving the thrill

Monday, November 8, 2010

Zeromancer feat Free Dominguez - House of Cards




How can you stand there and deny it
after all we have been through
How can you stand there and deny it
and make a fool out of you

Collapsing like houses of cards
and landing on splinters and glass

Wish I could fake it like you do
wish i could fake it just like you

How can you stand there and deny it
How can you stand there and deny it
Trust me now

Collapsing like houses of cards
and landing on splinters and glass
They crush your heart
but spare your feet
like judging people
you've yet to meet
well time is running fast
upon your reflection

trust me now

How can you stand there
Stand and deny it

Saturday, November 6, 2010

on the fastlane to my grave

i hate to admit it,
but i am building the key to my end,
immerse myself in risk and danger,
and speed will be my ticket out of this miserable world!

a 900kg car capable of doing 250kmh,
hahaha i am close to my goal,
no one can stop me now,
crash and go out in flames....

oh what an ending that could be, wouldnt you agree???

Friday, November 5, 2010

Can't Be Love...

Laura Izibor - Can't Be Love

They say love is supposed to set you free
Give you wings to fly
They say love is supposed to hold the key
To life and eternity

Ba da ba da da ba da da

So when the party’s over
You suddenly get colder
And I need someone to hold me tight
And tell me everything is gonna be alright

Can’t be love
‘cos I dont feel
And it ain’t enough
I don’t believe
Oh, believe in love
I don’t believe in love
I don’t believe in love

They say love has all the answers
To the questions
Well baby, I’m still lost
‘cos I don’t understand

Ba da ba da da ba da da

So you can tell me that you love me
A thousand times
But for you to show me
You couldn’t even if you tried

Can’t be love
‘cos I dont feel
And it ain’t enough
I don’t believe
Oh, believe in love
Said, I don’t believe in love
Believe in love
Oh, I don’t believe in love
Ohhh

On the outside
I know that it would make sense
On the inside, baby
It feels strange
You go your way
I go my way
‘cos it can’t be

Can’t be love
‘cos I dont feeling
No, no, no
And it ain’t enough
I don’t believe
No, no, no
Can’t be love
Yeah, yeah
Can’t be love
No, no, no
Can’t be love
Can’t be love
Ohh
It can’t be love

Thursday, November 4, 2010

suicidal tendencies...

i feel like slitting my throat,
why cant i just drop dead,
forget the world and never have to feel this pain again,
i have only myself to blame...